Hey, I haven’t wrote like this in a long ass time. Sorry if I cant express my feelings like i used to. Alright so /: I’m on Tumblr this one lonely night. It’s like 2 or 3 in the morning. I really don’t know what I’m doing up but I see this beautiful girl. It was just something about her smile. It attracted me to her. I wasn’t attracted physically or anything but to her beauty. It was as if I could tell how she was going to be. A very nice & sweet girl. I was deadass right. It’s crazy because i went to sleep and forgot i even had you on Tumblr. Then you reblogged my audio post. It was Thug Waffle by the Flatbush zombies. Then i realized i was like oh shit. I was kind of hype. I thought you were like Tumblr famous at the time. So i was freaking out. I’m just going to skip the Facebook incident because that was embarrassing. Anyways you randomly hit me up & we started texting. It’s crazy because we connect like that. It was so quick. We even snapshotted our convos and didn’t tell each other :x That spring break seemed so damn long. I couldn’t wait til i got the chance to hear your voice. Our first call was so long but i enjoyed every last bit of it. Idc if i was fucked up in the morning. You also called me to wake me up. That was the first time a girl ever did that to me. I miss those calls i swear :x. Damn, I’m about to write a damn book -__- The point is Shakira I fucking have so many feelings for you. Yes the curse was necessary because that’s how i really feel about you. We did so much stuff in a short time that it felt like we’ve been talking for a year or so. I don’t want to lose what we have now. When i told you I can’t imagine having any kids with someone else but you i was deadass serious. I know I back out of things a lot. Whenever I’m joking about you being with another guy, I don’t mean that shit. Deep down i know I want to be the only one who get to hold and kiss you. /: I just keep all of that stuff locked away because i don’t want to overwhelm you about how i feel for you. I don’t want to take anymore of your time. I love you even if you don’t feel the same. |: Bye.
Take Care Medley
"Sorry it’s my fault" The only words you can say to someone who you took away a future from. I was already emotionally fucked up.Nah, let me be honest I always been fucked up emotionally. But something about me wants me to wonder around and find other people to possibly start up something special.I don’t know when i should face it and give up because it seems i always attract the same type of girls. Who want a time of just fun but want to leave when things start to go serious or when things don’t start to go their way.Teenagers call this the "Chase".You oh you, Saying your name just makes me smile. I don’t know maybe I’m weird or someshit lol. But beneath that name nothing bad aura comes up. To be honest i just remember the time where we used to be go at each other and spam my Facebook page. Fun times. I even read some of the messages today. June 15th. Everything between us ended during June 1st. Why do i still look? I have the tendency to stick on someone when i should get over it already.But i can’t.Those late nights on Skype got to me. I would try to stay up to 3 am just to talk to you. Even though i knew i had to wake up at 7 in the morning the next day. Just some sacrifices i made for you. Thinking it would benefit in the future. I deeply had feelings for you and for you to only say "Im sorrry" that day. Just killed me, you know.I really was hoping to see you next year. i know you probably thought i was lying but i actually worked my ass off to convince my mom but shit happens. In my mind, im always thinking did you forget about me? If you did it seems so easy because im still dealing with it now. But like they "One’s treasure is another man’s treasure" Never actually got to know what it meant until now. I really hope everything goes well with Alex. Your Alex i meant to say.I don’t even know how to end this. I feel like i had more shit to say but i rather not. i just feel comfortable with ending it here.
Fuck it. There’s something about you. That attracts me to talk to you. And no its not because of that nude you gave . Even though you were my first<3. I don’t want to make it seem like i got a lot either. -_- I’m not going to delete that even though i just pointed out i have more then one now. Anyways, back on point. You probably wont read this so I’ll just keep on typing. The holidays wont be forget because i got to meet people like you and other at farmer. I was new to the whole private server thing and Danny&you showed me everything i should know. I missed those late nights where we would stay up to three just getting to know each other and point out the similarities.I kept thinking wow i cant wait to meet her and i was so curious to hear your voice. Friday December 31st was our first call. I was wasn’t recording the date our anything. that would be stalkerish. But it was saved on my old computer which i just checked 3 mins ago. I was a shy ass guy, i barely talked that night. But you stayed with me and didn’t just hang up and left. I just felt i was special in a kind of way like you were waiting for me to come out of a shell of shyness. January 3rd you break news to me your dating someone else. I never been in that situation where that ever happened. But we continued even though we knew it was going to end horribly. Sometime in February we stopped that relationship. So you can end up better with him. i backed off. Knowing i wasn’t any good at all to you. Just had a bad writers block. You would think a guy like me would just shrug it off because i know i can get with any other girl that I’m familiar with already. But somehow it stayed with me bad til this day. Til this day i look at your posts to see if you ever thought about me. Knowing that you don’t but it still seems to ponder me. Continuing on, you dumped him. i knew in my mind i had no chance but i still tried to pursue you. We talk one night you say “i love you”. Maybe i didn’t take it the same way you did but i felt quite different that night. Next morning i wake up to “I’m sorry. i know i wont be happy with you” Sad truth. But somehow i wanted it to be all different. Those words are words I’ll remember forever. Why do i keep talking to you ? idk. Its just sucks to see you in bad relationships. Its 11:54 i completed a total of 0 homework(s). And I’m signing off. I could have sent you this as anonymous but you still will figure its me. I have no way of being different. Anyways, I’m not expecting you to read this but if you do. Don’t ask me why i wrote. i don’t know myself.